In the beginning Nintendo created the Gameboy. The Gameboy went forth and prospered and there was much rejoicing. Then came another creator who on seeing the success of the Gameboy become enraged and mighty jealous. This creator, the Sony, gave birth to the PSP, and there was much rejoicing. Sony said unto the PSP, "go forth my child and spawn a catalogue of awesome games". The PSP went out into the world and spawned a line of games that mostly sucked balls, and there was much disappointment. Many years did pass until the Sony woke again. The Sony saw the lineup of games the PSP had spawned and agreed that they did both suck and blow in equally great amounts. And so the Sony said, "f this I'll show you how to make a decent PSP game" and so Patapon was born.
As well as stroking my megalomania, something that can't be helped when they start calling you the almighty, I got a feeling early on that I was in for something quite special with Patapon. The first very big thing this little game has going for it is it's originality, created from two well worn concepts of Music & Rhythm and Strategy gaming that are fused together to form a very enjoyable and addictive piece of work. The game plays both of these these sides in a well balanced manner. You command a tribe of Patapon with a few basic commands, forward, defend, attack and so on. To issue these commands you have to drum the main PSP buttons in a particular pattern to the beat the Patapons are thumping out for you. Square Square Square Circle is to move them forwards, Circle Square Circle Circle is to get them to attack. When you press Circle however you make the sound "Pon" and when you press Square you make the sound "Pata", therefore drumming "Pata Pata Pata Pon" will make them march and so forth and so on. You can't argue that this does turn out to be a lot of fun, you will learn the commands very quickly as you're repeating them all the time and they make a funky little beat that fits perfectly into the little Patapons singing. I did find a small negative, and I guess you're not supposed to really be playing the game like this, but after 9 hours over a few days of play I think I started to go a little loopy as well as gaining a stabbing pain in my thumb. It might be that I get songs stuck in my head rather easily but even now as I start to think of those little critters their singing comes back again, I hear those little buggers singing away in my head, there they are again, why don't the leave me alone, get them out, aaaaahhhhhhhhggggggggggg!!!!!!!!!
After drumming 10 beats in a row the Patapons then go into fever mode chucking spears higher and swinging axes faster and as you get better and better at hitting the beats at the right time you'll reach fever in less beats and stay there longer which becomes vital for later bosses. Hitting a good rhythm is only one key to success, the other is a carefully planed strategy and you'll really need both to get anywhere. You'll have to keep the level of Patapons up to finish most missions, making sure too many don't get gobbled up by big scary monsters but also by making more of them. From the Tree of Life you can create more Patapons, some with spears or arrows or horses, etc, however each Patapon will cost you in Ka-Ching which you gather from kills in battle and materials which you get from hunting and a rather odd dancing tree who likes jazz. I could not make this up if I tried. Anywoo using different materials will create different Patapons that will have very different properties, makes sense, but will also cost you way more Ka-ching to produce. You're also encouraged to change weapons, hats and shields you're minions posses but only after nicking them off your foes. And so your then off with your army of little eye balls as they pulverise the enemy square? eye balls, dragons and huge worms in the cutest possible way of course.
Be warned though, don't be fooled by the child pleasing look of this title, underneath its warm fuzzy lovable exterior is a thick lump of steel toe capped boot ready to plant its self squarely in your nut-sack the moment you stop taking it seriously. This IS kick in the balls tough. The first few levels are no doubt pleasant enough easing you into the idea of the game but soon afterwards you'll have to step your game up. Not all levels are so hard core but often you come across one that will require you to go back and do some hunting missions 3 or 4 times then defeat a boss, then grow more Patapon, then sit in a sound proof padded room with a metronome. As an example at one point you have to perform a miracle, and truly it was one that I pulled it off at all. You make it rain by getting up to fever while the flames of the desert are licking your balls, then do the little sequence which in turn sets off another sequence for you to perform. This "miracle" of rain last about 5 seconds giving you just enough time to get a little way across the desert before having to perform it again but not only that you have several sodding rocks to clear and a dam snail in front of you slowing you down. I'm not kidding a mother fucking giant snail that takes a Spartan army's worth of spears to kill!!! Maybe it's because I'm a lazy westerner spoilt by years of Need for Speed or driving Miss Daisy difficulties in WW2 shooters or I guess I'm missing some of bionic implants and seriously honed Japanese gaming skills our friends in the east posses. I shouldn't complain really, if you focus and remember your training you will be able to complete these levels.....eventually. It will take a few goes and several teeth marks in your PSP, but then the wave of satisfaction you get after will be worth it.
The visuals although basic in hardware rendering terms are as much super kawaii as a they are a real delight to gaze at and are perfectly formed for the PSP. Patapon really makes great use of the uber large wide-screen you have as well as giving you some of the fastest load times I've ever seen on the system, finally a game which is perfect for the PSP, I even found the battery seemed to last longer than usual. The themes and styles here are very Japanese, from the shadow puppet look to the very Zatochi dancing you're treated to when completing a mission. I think I'd go as far as describing it as one of the few examples of a game really being a work of art, standing comfortably alongside games like Silent Hill 2, ICO and Shadow of the Colossus despite the lack of polygon counts, odd how Sony often have to make these themselves.
There is not much more I can say except never before have I seen a game so well crafted for the PSP; if you don't buy yours a copy when your PSP dies the Sony, the creator, will judge it's life and see the PSP's unfulfilled potential and wasted life then surly let it burn in silicon hell for all eternity, and you wouldn't want that to happen would you?
As well as stroking my megalomania, something that can't be helped when they start calling you the almighty, I got a feeling early on that I was in for something quite special with Patapon. The first very big thing this little game has going for it is it's originality, created from two well worn concepts of Music & Rhythm and Strategy gaming that are fused together to form a very enjoyable and addictive piece of work. The game plays both of these these sides in a well balanced manner. You command a tribe of Patapon with a few basic commands, forward, defend, attack and so on. To issue these commands you have to drum the main PSP buttons in a particular pattern to the beat the Patapons are thumping out for you. Square Square Square Circle is to move them forwards, Circle Square Circle Circle is to get them to attack. When you press Circle however you make the sound "Pon" and when you press Square you make the sound "Pata", therefore drumming "Pata Pata Pata Pon" will make them march and so forth and so on. You can't argue that this does turn out to be a lot of fun, you will learn the commands very quickly as you're repeating them all the time and they make a funky little beat that fits perfectly into the little Patapons singing. I did find a small negative, and I guess you're not supposed to really be playing the game like this, but after 9 hours over a few days of play I think I started to go a little loopy as well as gaining a stabbing pain in my thumb. It might be that I get songs stuck in my head rather easily but even now as I start to think of those little critters their singing comes back again, I hear those little buggers singing away in my head, there they are again, why don't the leave me alone, get them out, aaaaahhhhhhhhggggggggggg!!!!!!!!!
After drumming 10 beats in a row the Patapons then go into fever mode chucking spears higher and swinging axes faster and as you get better and better at hitting the beats at the right time you'll reach fever in less beats and stay there longer which becomes vital for later bosses. Hitting a good rhythm is only one key to success, the other is a carefully planed strategy and you'll really need both to get anywhere. You'll have to keep the level of Patapons up to finish most missions, making sure too many don't get gobbled up by big scary monsters but also by making more of them. From the Tree of Life you can create more Patapons, some with spears or arrows or horses, etc, however each Patapon will cost you in Ka-Ching which you gather from kills in battle and materials which you get from hunting and a rather odd dancing tree who likes jazz. I could not make this up if I tried. Anywoo using different materials will create different Patapons that will have very different properties, makes sense, but will also cost you way more Ka-ching to produce. You're also encouraged to change weapons, hats and shields you're minions posses but only after nicking them off your foes. And so your then off with your army of little eye balls as they pulverise the enemy square? eye balls, dragons and huge worms in the cutest possible way of course.
Be warned though, don't be fooled by the child pleasing look of this title, underneath its warm fuzzy lovable exterior is a thick lump of steel toe capped boot ready to plant its self squarely in your nut-sack the moment you stop taking it seriously. This IS kick in the balls tough. The first few levels are no doubt pleasant enough easing you into the idea of the game but soon afterwards you'll have to step your game up. Not all levels are so hard core but often you come across one that will require you to go back and do some hunting missions 3 or 4 times then defeat a boss, then grow more Patapon, then sit in a sound proof padded room with a metronome. As an example at one point you have to perform a miracle, and truly it was one that I pulled it off at all. You make it rain by getting up to fever while the flames of the desert are licking your balls, then do the little sequence which in turn sets off another sequence for you to perform. This "miracle" of rain last about 5 seconds giving you just enough time to get a little way across the desert before having to perform it again but not only that you have several sodding rocks to clear and a dam snail in front of you slowing you down. I'm not kidding a mother fucking giant snail that takes a Spartan army's worth of spears to kill!!! Maybe it's because I'm a lazy westerner spoilt by years of Need for Speed or driving Miss Daisy difficulties in WW2 shooters or I guess I'm missing some of bionic implants and seriously honed Japanese gaming skills our friends in the east posses. I shouldn't complain really, if you focus and remember your training you will be able to complete these levels.....eventually. It will take a few goes and several teeth marks in your PSP, but then the wave of satisfaction you get after will be worth it.
The visuals although basic in hardware rendering terms are as much super kawaii as a they are a real delight to gaze at and are perfectly formed for the PSP. Patapon really makes great use of the uber large wide-screen you have as well as giving you some of the fastest load times I've ever seen on the system, finally a game which is perfect for the PSP, I even found the battery seemed to last longer than usual. The themes and styles here are very Japanese, from the shadow puppet look to the very Zatochi dancing you're treated to when completing a mission. I think I'd go as far as describing it as one of the few examples of a game really being a work of art, standing comfortably alongside games like Silent Hill 2, ICO and Shadow of the Colossus despite the lack of polygon counts, odd how Sony often have to make these themselves.
There is not much more I can say except never before have I seen a game so well crafted for the PSP; if you don't buy yours a copy when your PSP dies the Sony, the creator, will judge it's life and see the PSP's unfulfilled potential and wasted life then surly let it burn in silicon hell for all eternity, and you wouldn't want that to happen would you?
Comments